Momma Got Schooled

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Today’s post is a writing challenge. This is how it works: participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words or short phrases for someone else to craft into a post. All words must be used at least once and all the posts will be unique as each writer has received their own set of words. That’s the challenge, here’s a fun twist; no one who’s participating knows who got their words and in what direction the writer will take them. Until now.

My words are:

Office ~ great ~ pillows ~ cat ~ hat

They were submitted by: http://www.southernbellecharm.com

At the end of this post you’ll find links to the other blogs featuring this challenge. Check them all out, see what words they got and how they used them.

If you’ve been following my blog at all then you know that we recently decided to homeschool our son.  We’ve only been doing it since feels like forever January and it’s definitely taken some getting used to on both our parts.  I would definitely say it’s been very positive and I’ve seen so much growth in him already.  I just miss my free time.  A little.  Or maybe a lottle.

I wouldn’t trade this time for anything.  We’ve definitely bonded over this experience and I’m proud to be such a positive influence in my son’s daily learning environment.  The confidence he’s exhibited in his abilities and the leaps and bounds he’s growing both emotionally and mentally just can’t be measured, but…

I am never alone.  NEVER.  Like ever.

And we downsized so now there is even less space for me to never be alone in.  Sometimes, if I’m being honest, it’s a little claustrophobic.  I long for the days when I could walk around the house stark naked eating ice-cream and watching soap operas with absolutely no one around to judge me.  Not that any of those things actually happened…that you can prove anyway…but you get my point.  I knew that sacrifices would be made, and apparently spontaneous nudity and ice-cream bingeing are the proverbial lambs in this scenario.  Anyway, this blog isn’t about my nudity (thank goodness!), it’s about using words in a sentence or a collection of sentences that form, in this case, a blog post.  Words I don’t get to choose.  Much like my son’s weekly spelling assignments in which he has to make sentences out of a few of his spelling words.  This has got to be the worst segue ever but I really struggled with how I was going to use these words, and then this week my son had a spelling assignment and suddenly I knew exactly how I was going to use the words I’d been given!

In his “brick and mortar” school (I’m so down with the home-school lingo), my little man HATED writing.  And reading.  And math.  Ok pretty much everything but recess and lunch.  Now, one of his favorite assignments are turning his spelling words into a paragraphical work of art (his words).  He is supposed to write individual sentences for each word choice, but he’s taken liberties with this assignment and turned his spelling words into a mini 1 to 4 sentence story paragraph.  I let him go with it, because he’s never been this creative when it comes to writing.  He loves to read to me what he comes up with and it’s fun to see him excited about writing and spelling.

In this weeks assignment the words were: trustworthy, desert, competition, dessert, qualify and flame.

“The trustworthy kids were in the desert in a competition for dessert but you had to qualify by putting your foot in a flame!”

I mean genius right?!?!

Ok, here’s another!

The words were: handsome, accountant, minimum, adjectives, blindfold and gentleman

“Once on a dark cold winter day, there was a very handsome gentleman named Lazy Larry.  Lazy Larry was an accountant making minimum wage, even though he also studies the art of amazing, awesome adjectives and before he sleeps each night he puts on a blindfold and that is the end of the story of Lazy Larry.”

And my personal favorite!

The words were: muscle, muscular, customary, quest, principal and principle (spelling danger words (homographs) are so fun!)

“Once there was a very muscular man and even his muscles had muscle and his name was Man, which was customary back then.  He lived in a cave.  He was a caveman on a quest to be the best caveman with the principle to never hurt anyone, either large or small.  Unfortunately, Man served a principal named Guy, also customary. Guy was mean, but Man got to leave on this amazing adventure and was never seen again because there was a meteor.  The end.”

I asked for his help on my words and he respectfully declined.  Apparently, he’s done HIS work for the day and he can’t be responsible for MY work and I shouldn’t have procrastinated.  It really sucks when your kids use your own words against you.

So, in the spirit of channeling my inner 5th grade boy, I present to you my most magnificent paragraphical work of USE MY WORDS art!

My words again are:  Office ~ great ~ pillows ~ cat ~ hat

“In the office of the land’s great seat of power sits a cat, on a stack of pillows because he’s a cat and otherwise wouldn’t be able to see over the desk without it, wearing a hat so tall they had to build a special skylight above the desk to accommodate it’s great size which is fitting for the cat’s great responsibility in the office of the land’s great seat of power.”

Clearly, my son comes by his gifts naturally.  So I read my work of genius to him and I got…silence.  Nothing but silence.  Then he says, maybe I should help you.  And pats me gently on the back, shaking his head sadly.

He tells me to sit and he’ll show me how it’s done…

Here is his contribution:

“The amazing office with the great pillows had a grand cat but an odd cat.  This cat was wearing a hat and this cat was called the cat with the hat.”

I mean…  There is a very clear winner here.  Right?

Dr. Seuss either of us are not.  Obviously.

But I still think we both make the grade and the best part of my day is when we get to be silly like this and laugh with each other.  Way better than spontaneous nudity and alone time is overrated.  I’ll cherish these moments forever and ever.  Amen.

(maybe I can join a senior retirement nudist camp in my twilight years…so there’s that)

Links to the other “Use Your Words” posts:

Baking In A Tornado                        http://www.bakinginatornado.com

Spatulas on Parade                   http://spatulasonparade.blogspot.com/

The Diary of an Alzheimer’s Caregiver        http://www.thediaryofanalzheimerscaregiver.com/blog.html

Sparkly Poetic Weirdo                        http://sparklyjenn.blogspot.com/

On the Border                           http://dlt-lifeontheranch.blogspot.com/

Bookworm in the Kitchen             http://www.bookwormkitchen.com/

The Bergham Chronicles                  http://berghamchronicles.blogspot.com

Simply Shannon                           http://shannonbutler.org

Southern Belle Charm                    http://www.southernbellecharm.com

The Angrivated Mom                      http://www.angrivatedmom.wordpress.com/

Climaxed                                      http://climaxedtheblog.blogspot.com

Not That Sarah Michelle                 http://notthatsarahmichelle.blogspot.com

Kick the Bucket List

I’ve not been feeling particularly inspired to write this weekend, until I received the September 30th “Blog Dare” writing prompt tweet from Bloggy Moms.  I wouldn’t really say I was inspired, it was more of a twinge really, but I’m going to run with it.  The prompt instructed me to add an item to my bucket list.  Since, I don’t really have a bucket list per se, I decided to make one!  I remember standing at the Cliffs of Moher in Ireland (the pic shown above) and wanting to pinch myself because OMG, I was in Ireland!  I remember standing there looking out over the water, struck by the sheer beauty of my surroundings, thinking that anything should be possible.  I was in freaking Ireland!  IRELAND!  Certainly, a bucket list item.  Of course, it was freezing, and raining on and off, and it was a long, steep walk and I could barely breathe, and I didn’t have gloves or a good raincoat, and I never thought I would ever be warm again, and I seriously considered throwing myself off the cliffs versus having to walk all the way back down, but I was in Ireland people!

Thinking back on this day, I thought about other items I would place on my bucket list.  You know, the things I would like to do before I, well….kick the bucket.  I’ll start with 5 items, and build from there!

BUCKET LIST

  1. Trace one of Adam Levine’s tattoo’s…with my tongue.  Too much?  I’d let him pick the tattoo.  Still, no?  Okay fine.  How about a hug?  A full body contact hug, not one of those arm around the shoulder friend hugs.  And it has to last at least 30 seconds.  Wait, why am I negotiating?  This is MY bucket list.  Adam Levine is getting naked.  Or at least topless.  What do those Supermodels have that I don’t?  I probably have that backwards.  What do I have that those Supermodels don’t have?  4 kids.  A husband.  Excess poundage.  I don’t think the items on your bucket list are supposed to depress you are they?  Back to Adam Levine…naked (if you are concerned about my husband, ask him who he has placed on his “get out of jail free” card/bucket list).  

2. Bring on the boobs.  New ones.  This bucket list item assumes I’m down to my goal weight.  These boobs have had children.  These boobs have gone through many weight transitions, many times.  These boobs need a makeover.  Heck, these boobs need an intervention.  These boobs are the Courtney Love of body parts.  A strung out, droopy  out of control hot mess.  So yeah, I’m putting boobs on my bucket list.

3. Run a Marathon.  Eat my way through Italy.  My husband and I both want this trip to Italy.  Hopefully, I’ll be thin and sporting new boobs before this trip happens, so I can get fat again.  Seriously, if I don’t leave Italy 20 lbs heavier, then I didn’t do it right.  Of course, then I’ll have to lose the  20 lbs and my new boobs might suffer a bit, so a new lift might be necessary.  I’m not sure I’ll make it through the first surgery.  The thought of those drainage tubes almost does me in.  Have I mentioned I have a low pain tolerance (as in non-existent?).  So, maybe gaining 20 lbs and ruining my new boobs should be reconsidered.  The problem is that the first place I gain and lose weight is my boobs.  God forbid, it be my stomach.  Oh, now I’m really sorry I brought up my stomach.  Let the downward shame spiral begin….I need a brownie.  Or a cookie.  Or a Hershey chocolate bar with almonds.  Yummmmm.  FOCUS.  ITALY.  Bucket List.  Okay, I’m back.  So, yeah, the hubs and I want to go to Italy someday.

4.  Be a triathlete.  Write a book.  I feel like I have a book in me.  Someday, very soon, I hope I get the nerve to go for it.  There are so many fantastic people who were considered “late bloomers” in their successes.  Julia Child decided to learn how to cook after 40, and didn’t publish “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” until she was almost 50!  Laura Ingalls Wilder was in her 40’s before she decided to become a writer.  I loved her books as a child.  Joseph Conrad, Richard Adams, Kenneth Grahame, Marquis de Sade and Mary Wesley didn’t begin their writing careers until ages 35 or older, some even in their 50’s!  I’ve always wanted to be a writer.  I remember my great-grandmother telling me as a young girl that she thought I’d be a great writer someday.  She also gave me my love for bacon, which I can proudly say I’ve mastered.  Of course, I’m afraid of failing.  Who isn’t?  I’m debilitated by the thought of rejection.  I don’t know that I have the discipline to accomplish this goal, but I know that I don’t want to look back on my life and know that I didn’t even try.

5.  Become an Ironman.   Run a marathon.  Stop laughing.  I’m serious.  Really?  Yes, really!  My original goal was to complete a marathon before I turned 40.  I think we all know how that turned out.  I’ve decided not to put a specific date on this item, just before death…obviously.  I hate running.  I hate exercise.  So, why would I put running a marathon on my list.  Considering licking Adam Levine is number 1, I think it’s safe to say I’m delusional at best.  On the other hand, if Adam Levine was waiting at the finish line…

So there it is.  The beginning of my Bucket List.  Yay me.  I’m exhausted.  Number 6 is gonna be a nap.  No, seriously, I went to the gym today.

What (or who) would be on your bucket list?

Tomorrow I begin this blog challenge where I blog every day for 31 days.  Talk about exhausted!  Ya’ll will be sick of me by November 1st, if I don’t bore you to death.

Nap time….

Sweet dreams….

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