I’ve not been feeling particularly inspired to write this weekend, until I received the September 30th “Blog Dare” writing prompt tweet from Bloggy Moms. I wouldn’t really say I was inspired, it was more of a twinge really, but I’m going to run with it. The prompt instructed me to add an item to my bucket list. Since, I don’t really have a bucket list per se, I decided to make one! I remember standing at the Cliffs of Moher in Ireland (the pic shown above) and wanting to pinch myself because OMG, I was in Ireland! I remember standing there looking out over the water, struck by the sheer beauty of my surroundings, thinking that anything should be possible. I was in freaking Ireland! IRELAND! Certainly, a bucket list item. Of course, it was freezing, and raining on and off, and it was a long, steep walk and I could barely breathe, and I didn’t have gloves or a good raincoat, and I never thought I would ever be warm again, and I seriously considered throwing myself off the cliffs versus having to walk all the way back down, but I was in Ireland people!
Thinking back on this day, I thought about other items I would place on my bucket list. You know, the things I would like to do before I, well….kick the bucket. I’ll start with 5 items, and build from there!
- Trace one of Adam Levine’s tattoo’s…with my tongue. Too much? I’d let him pick the tattoo. Still, no? Okay fine. How about a hug? A full body contact hug, not one of those arm around the shoulder friend hugs. And it has to last at least 30 seconds. Wait, why am I negotiating? This is MY bucket list. Adam Levine is getting naked. Or at least topless. What do those Supermodels have that I don’t? I probably have that backwards. What do I have that those Supermodels don’t have? 4 kids. A husband. Excess poundage. I don’t think the items on your bucket list are supposed to depress you are they? Back to Adam Levine…naked (if you are concerned about my husband, ask him who he has placed on his “get out of jail free” card/bucket list).
2. Bring on the boobs. New ones. This bucket list item assumes I’m down to my goal weight. These boobs have had children. These boobs have gone through many weight transitions, many times. These boobs need a makeover. Heck, these boobs need an intervention. These boobs are the Courtney Love of body parts. A strung out, droopy out of control hot mess. So yeah, I’m putting boobs on my bucket list.
Run a Marathon. Eat my way through Italy. My husband and I both want this trip to Italy. Hopefully, I’ll be thin and sporting new boobs before this trip happens, so I can get fat again. Seriously, if I don’t leave Italy 20 lbs heavier, then I didn’t do it right. Of course, then I’ll have to lose the 20 lbs and my new boobs might suffer a bit, so a new lift might be necessary. I’m not sure I’ll make it through the first surgery. The thought of those drainage tubes almost does me in. Have I mentioned I have a low pain tolerance (as in non-existent?). So, maybe gaining 20 lbs and ruining my new boobs should be reconsidered. The problem is that the first place I gain and lose weight is my boobs. God forbid, it be my stomach. Oh, now I’m really sorry I brought up my stomach. Let the downward shame spiral begin….I need a brownie. Or a cookie. Or a Hershey chocolate bar with almonds. Yummmmm. FOCUS. ITALY. Bucket List. Okay, I’m back. So, yeah, the hubs and I want to go to Italy someday.
Be a triathlete. Write a book. I feel like I have a book in me. Someday, very soon, I hope I get the nerve to go for it. There are so many fantastic people who were considered “late bloomers” in their successes. Julia Child decided to learn how to cook after 40, and didn’t publish “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” until she was almost 50! Laura Ingalls Wilder was in her 40’s before she decided to become a writer. I loved her books as a child. Joseph Conrad, Richard Adams, Kenneth Grahame, Marquis de Sade and Mary Wesley didn’t begin their writing careers until ages 35 or older, some even in their 50’s! I’ve always wanted to be a writer. I remember my great-grandmother telling me as a young girl that she thought I’d be a great writer someday. She also gave me my love for bacon, which I can proudly say I’ve mastered. Of course, I’m afraid of failing. Who isn’t? I’m debilitated by the thought of rejection. I don’t know that I have the discipline to accomplish this goal, but I know that I don’t want to look back on my life and know that I didn’t even try.
Become an Ironman. Run a marathon. Stop laughing. I’m serious. Really? Yes, really! My original goal was to complete a marathon before I turned 40. I think we all know how that turned out. I’ve decided not to put a specific date on this item, just before death…obviously. I hate running. I hate exercise. So, why would I put running a marathon on my list. Considering licking Adam Levine is number 1, I think it’s safe to say I’m delusional at best. On the other hand, if Adam Levine was waiting at the finish line…
So there it is. The beginning of my Bucket List. Yay me. I’m exhausted. Number 6 is gonna be a nap. No, seriously, I went to the gym today.
What (or who) would be on your bucket list?
Tomorrow I begin this blog challenge where I blog every day for 31 days. Talk about exhausted! Ya’ll will be sick of me by November 1st, if I don’t bore you to death.